Smoker? Who Me?

Well, here we go! Monday was my official start date for the smoking down to nothing. I normally smoke about 1 pack a day (20 ciggies) and so Monday was my "full" day. I did pretty good and actually only smoked 16. So yesterday was a 15-smoke-day and today has been a 14-smoke-day. So far so good. I think I'm mostly doing okay. I don't really have a choice as I AM quitting, but I'd like to do it with as little pain as possible. The gradual cessation has been somewhat difficult in that everyday, I freak out a little bit at smoking one less. But I think I've been overall doing well. It's funny because by the end of the day, the last couple of smokes are pretty awful. Saw my GP yesterday and he's happy for me and suggested nicotine gum to help with any cravings I might have. I'm really not having that many and it just passes if I give it some time. I've been trying to hold off for as long as I can before having the smoke, and have done pretty good. I really don't want to get the patch or the gum, because that just means I have to rid myself of the nicotine addiction twice. Once for the smokes and once for the replacement therapies. If I find that it's really getting to hard to continue cutting down, I will do it though. Anything to quit!

I need lots of positive reinforcement right now and Paul (as always) is very helpful. He's my smoke pusher and gives me my allotment of smokes for the day in the morning. When I first told him on Sunday, the first and only thing he said was "Oh...your car will be so much cleaner." Yeah, he's pretty much in the doghouse for that one! Right this second I'm chewing on a bit of a straw that seems to help with the holding off. Technically, I "can" have one, but I like to see how far I can go before I get wonky.

This isn't going to probably be getting any easier anytime soon. So send your happy non-smoker thoughts to me and help me get over this hump! I'm not a person who says she's going to quit all the time so this is the real thing and I am a non-smoker now (okay, technically two weeks from now). I'm hoping once I get down to only five or four a day, I'll just throw in the towel and quit forever. Seems silly to be smoking only a few a day. Might as well go all the way and just stop. So anyway, just thought I'd share this and beg you all for some good wishes and positive thinking. God knows I'm not getting enough at home! I need MORE!!! :)

Love,
B

Driveway is dead sexy

Yesterday, we had our driveway paved! Very exciting stuff there. Attached some pics. My first thought was..."holy shit, has our driveway ALWAYS looked that BIG?" Really improves the joint I think!




Also, promised some pics of the garden and here those are. There is some arugula gifted to me by Linda (a co-worker). Her and I share seeds and tips all the time! She also gave me some garlic to throw in the garden come Oct. She did it last year and got some wonderful garlic in May.


Lettuce blend-grow bitches...grow!


Overview of the "fall" garden. Forefront is bean plants, then everything else. The blank spot is for the lettuce blend.


You can see the bean plants and the spaghetti squash and the cukes well. The tiny little sprouts are broccoli and cabbage.


Here's the arugula. Basically, a form of lettuce as I was told.


From the back, peppers, on the left is radishes, then okra. Right is spinach, then eggplant (yes, they're tiny).


Here you can really see from right, the cukes, squash, okra and radishes. I don't know why, but I'm always surprised when I get nearly 100% germination. But this time around (unlike in the Spring) I took into account how small the garden is and tried to plan accordingly.


Oh my. Does anyone else get such pleasure from seeing all these beautiful peppers as I do? Just tells you I've become a serious gardening nerd.

Not as fun stuff, but I went to the specialist on the 6th. In looking at the blood tests I most recently had done...still hyperactive thyroid! Shocker there. I was reeling from it. Okay, not really. I was totally expecting it. Although, there was this stupid, small optimistic part of me that hoped the blood might have gotten better. Alas, not to be. The endo (super nice lady) told me it was mostly likely due to Grave's Disease (which for any who might be wondering) is an auto-immune disorder. Thanks mom and dad for the defective genes! Hehe. But the good news is, no eye involvement. So, we decided on a course of PTU (anti-thyroid meds), a beta-blocker (makes your heart and blood pressure be low and hopefully more stable) and birth control pills. Ha! Yeah, funny. But she's pretty freaked at the thought of my possibly getting pregnant while my thyroid is still out of control. So, to placate her, I agreed to go on them. With the caveat that it will be short-term. I told Paul I'm just saving my eggs :)

Got all the meds and started the night of the 6th. Got a swanky little pill carrier too to help me remember when to take what. I go in for another round of blood tests next week to see if there's been any improvement and, if not, I think we'll probably up the PTU. If there's an improvement, I go in two weeks for more blood taken (vampires), and then see her a week after that to discuss where we are and if we're seeing anything good. We'll make more decisions at that point. The fun thing about the meds is that the beta-blocker suppresses your BP so you have to be careful standing up so you don't pass out cold. I told the people at work that if they find me laid out on the floor, it's just the drugs. How often in your life do you get to say that and it's NOT illegal? I'm hopeful that the meds will wrestle my perky thyroid under control. Also, because of all this crap, I will be quitting smoking. None of my doctors want the cold turkey approach, so I'm to ease myself off of them, to avoid stressing my thyroid and making it be all wacky again.

Enough of THAT boring old crap. Still have heard nothing about that job. Aw well. The more time goes by, the more I'm getting anxious. I was all existential about it at first, but now I'm freaking!!!! No...no. I am NOT freaking...*trying to convince myself.

Been dreaming of the new iMacs. Yikes. 24-inches of beautiful computer. Dual-core. Tons of bank...sigh. Maybe next year! Well, I think that's about it for now. Big ol' update here. Not really, just lots of pics of my pretty garden and new driveway. Hope ya'll are doing well! I'm off for Nebraska and school this weekend.

Love,
B

What's in the garden & other mystical questions...

As always, lots to type up and talk about. Nothing terribly interesting, but that's my life. The most difficult part is to remember everything I want to talk about and try to keep my wacked-out brain in the right track and not go off on random tangents and then forget what I wanted to say. So, first things first. Here's some pics of our **NEW & IMPROVED** front deck. Paul took some vacation time to get some things done around the house and this is by far the prettiest thing. He cleaned the old crusty boards and re-stained them. Tell us what ya'll think! (He's getting pretty damn handy.)




The garden is nearly officially torn up. I've got my pepper plants left and my bean plants that I direct seeded a while ago. I've been getting some great ideas from this blog: http://inmykitchengarden.blogspot.com. She's funny and keeps you entertained. I learned how to get seeds for next year's crop so could save money that way. I wanted to do it, just wasn't sure how. Duh, I know! Just dry em out and see what happens! Ordered and received my seeds so I'm pumped to get those seedlings started. Unfortunately, I have no dirt, so maybe Paul will get that for me tomorrow morning. He's back at work, but doesn't have to go in until 1 pm and is going to Lowe's anyway. I pulled up the rest of the tomato plants and the zucchini, then tilled til I couldn't til no more. Then Paul got me some good 'ol 10-10-10 fertilizer to get into the soil and let it recoup a bit while the seeds are growing inside. I'll take pics once they start to sprout. The stuff I decided on is the following (from gurneys.com if you're interested):

1 66311 SPINACH TYEE PKT
1 66247 OKRA RED BURGUNDY PKT.
2 14617 LETTUCE BLEND PKT.
1 66219 EGGPLANT DUSKY HYBRID PKT
1 66182 CABBAGE GOLDEN ACRE PKT
1 14521 CUCUMBER HYBRID SWEET SUCCESSP
1 67936 BROCCOLI SOUTHERN COMET HYB PK
1 14979 RADISH CHAMPION PKT/G

We're planning on expanding the garden next year and I'll be extra watchful for those stupid squash bugs. I'm hoping since I've decimated their environment, they've moved on to greener pastures and won't attack my winter squash I'm planning. I'm trying to talk Paul into selling the house and buying 100 acres then we could retire and live off the land. Okay, not really, but it would be interesting if nothing else. I'll take a pic and post it of what's left of the garden so far. Hopefully, the frost will hold off and we can get some fall yummies.

This weekend was my brother's 40th b-day and we had a surprise party for him. Okay, the biggest surprise was that he figured us out. Not really even a surprise there. But I think he was hoping mom was here, but wasn't entirely sure, so he really was happy to see her. The party went really well, I didn't personally get any pictures, but if I get them from anyone else, I'll post for you.

For graduate school stuff, our team is the first to get organized with a name, Baker Street Irregulars. If you're a Sherlock Holmes fan, you'll get it. I thought it would be appropriate, and everyone liked it. So, our team for this Crime Scene House Practical is awesome. We got the one and only police officer and nurse. We're so cool. Basically, they give us a scene and we have 4 hours to collect evidence, take photos, etc. Then the rest of the year to analyze the evidence, then in July we go before a mock grand jury and present it. Sounds simple, but there's a ton involved! I did get my safety glasses and lab coat in the mail so I'm set for Sat.'s class. We start on GC-MS. Woohoo! Finally, getting my hands dirty!

I wasn't going to say much about it since I don't really have a shot in hell, but I figure why not? I'm totally happy that I even got a phone call. I applied for a job with the KCPD crime lab and actually got both a phone interview and subsequent "one-on-one" interview. That's in quotes because that's what the guy on the phone told me when we set it up. Turns out it was really a "four-on-one" interview. Let me tell ya, think you're nervous talking to one person? Try it with four. Not any easier. I think I did okay but my lack of experience will hurt me. They liked me, but there's four others interviewing for it this week. They will make the decision sometime in the next month, but I'm not holding my breath. I'm just grateful that I actually got the opportunity to interview! This tells me the following: Since I have sent my resume to them before and got not a whimper back, my graduate school MUST be doing something. It's presence on my CV got me a call back. That means the thousands of dollars I'm now in debt may not be in vain. So, after I get through my last year where I actually get more hands-on experience, I may be in pretty decent shape to get a job. I'm hopeful anyway! Now, I also know more what to expect in these situations. I also got fingerprinted and as they did not arrest me on the spot, I figure I must have no warrants out for my arrest. Always good to know. I'll let you know when they tell me what their decision is!

I think that's all for now and I'll try to post some pics of the garden later this week. I do have two lab reports and some other little homework to do before Fri., so may not get a chance. Talk to ya soon!

Love,
B

Big, Long, Ugly Update

Haven't updated in forever and a lot has been going on. Well, I'm typing this at my cousin's house in Nebraska right now. That's wight wabbit, school has begun. I have my first class tonight. For those keeping track, no, I didn't normally have class Fridays, but this year, we have class Friday night from 6 to 10p and Sat. from 8 to 5, so lots more class time. Fridays are lecture and Saturdays are lab. We get to do everything from mass spec. to gas chromatography to DNA stuff. Very exciting. So this year is going to be more fun and much harder I'm sure. We also were broken into groups and we are an investigative team. The school owns a "crime house" and they will set up a crime that we are to investigate all year long and in July we go up in front of a mock grand jury to argue our case. Sounds fun, but taking a look at the syllabus, tons of time and papers involved. Yikes.

Need to find a decent lab coat and safety glasses so have been checking around for those. No, I didn't procrastinate, I just found out about it yesterday. Fortunately, I work in a lab and swiped stuff from there (with permission of course, hehe).

Garden is nearly done. My zucchini got attacked by a sweet little sumbitch called the squash bug. Look him up. Nasty little SOBs. I didn't know what they were and didn't kill them off when I first saw them, so they were allowed to propagate. I went through and hacked out a bunch of dead leaves and killed the larvae and adults that I could find, but I'm not sure it will recover. The tomatoes were looking awful, but still producing decent tomatoes, so I finally went in and got rid of all but 5 of the plants and really sheared off a vast majority of the leaves on the remaining five. They should still at least ripen what's on there now and that'll be the end of it. These fell victim to bacterial canker, which really sucks. Nothing I could've done to save them! And I have to be extra careful about planting next year. I was doing all this to start my fall garden, which will probably include radishes, vegetable squash, cucumbers and maybe some broccoli and cabbage. Definitely some lettuce mix stuff. I did all the research into varieties and time to mature and just need to order the seeds. I'll let you know how it goes!

I've recently been diagnosed with hyperthyroidism, most likely due to Grave's Disease. I won't go into brutal detail, but I see a specialist in Sept, so will keep everyone posted. It does appear to possibly be going into remission on its own, which would be wonderful to avoid lots of medication and/or killing off the thyroid. That's the preferred method of "treatment" in this country, but I think it's akin to saying "I have a hangnail on my big toe" and them saying, "well, let's cut the whole damn foot off." I've been researching the disease to my little ol' heart's content and am armed with tons of information and alternative treatments if it comes to that, but we're shooting for remission :)

My brother's is turning 40 next Sat. Wow. Old man! Hehe, that's all I'll say about that and everyone knows why, (secrets, secrets).

Paul's car project is coming along, although now he's complaining that it's "not loud enough for a drag car" so I'm sure pretty soon I'll be hearing thunderous gunning of the engine. If you're in anyway interested in cars, his blog is listed here for your enjoyment. He recently met up with some family in Iowa for a couple of days and got to see aunts/uncles/dad/sis/etc. They headed up to Wisconsin for some cheese curds, which he doesn't like. But he was nice enough to bring me back two bags. I don't remember if I like them or not, but they are waiting for me in the fridge to try out when I get home.

We're working on thinking about getting the bathroom remodeled. We will be paying someone else to do that though. It's the only bathroom in the house and we can't be without it for an extended period of time. I'm not big on the idea of using chamber pots for two weeks! Yeah, I would have a hard time roughing it, I know.

If anyone caught the news yesterday you know about the terrorist plot that the Brits foiled. Boy, nobody messes around in England. They rock. They had 20+ people arrested pretty quickly! Scary to think though that there's still people out there wanting to "make a statement" and that they were so close to accomplishing their goals. Twisted though they are. I don't know about anyone else, but as a child of the 80s, I think we were actually pretty lucky in having the Cold War. Beats this shit any day of the week. Like Lewis Black said in his recent HBO special (which was hilarious) how do you fight against a people that WANTS to die and have no problem killing innocent men, women and children to accomplish that? He thinks we need to show them we're just as psychotic and vote in a dead president. As in, vote in Reagan and prop him up to show the world WE ARE INSANE. There's something very comforting in that idea. Well, I'm not sure the word "comforting" is what I'm shooting for, but you get the idea.

Well, I think I'd better go and get some reading done. Yikes, homework first, class second. There is something so twisted with that.

Love,
B

Garden Madness!

Don't really have much to talk about that's actually interesting...so here's a pic of the zucchini from my garden. They have been delicious and I've given a bunch away already. When I went out there tonight, I saw five growing. Yikes. I think I'll let one just grow to see how big it gets. Although, I get really unsure because I want to EAT it, so just pick it. Here's Paul holding one of the ones that got away from me for a while.



Love,
B

Request for supplies/help!

I have asked a lot of my family and friends, but this is perhaps one of the most important things we can contribute. Our soldiers are overseas and lacking many necessaties and other items. I am putting together some care packages to ship overseas. These packages are huge morale boosters and the soldiers can't say enough about how they feel when a package arrives. There are some signs that the package deliveries have been slowing down a bit for some and I think we need to all pull together and let them know we're still here, supporting them. Even if you don't agree with the war, those are our kids over there and they could use some help. Most of the items they are requesting are cheap and things we take for granted, but are amazing for them and a huge boost. If you would like to help out, you can either send me any items you've picked up and I'll throw everything together (I would like to spread it out over two or three packages) or send me some money and I'll buy the items directly. I would also ask that if you send any items, please enclose a note or letter of support. Since the soldiers are constantly moving around, I can't give you the information for which battalions we will be sending the packages to at this time, so just a simple note of support with your name, address and email addy will be enough. Below is a list of the most requested items:

1) DVDs
2) Magazines (any kind)
3) Puzzles
4) Games
5) Decks of cards
6) Books
7) Drawing tablets and drawing pens
8) Toothpaste
9) Toothbrushes
10) Female underwear (usually this is completely unavailable to the female soldiers, blows my mind)
11) Feminine hygiene products
12) Deoderant
13) Body washes, especially good smelling ones
14) Shampoo
15) Conditioner
16) Laundry soap
17) Stain fighting products for clothes
18) Body sprays
19) Air fresheners
20) Microwave popcorn (both kettle corn and regular)
21) 220V to 110V adaptors
22) CDs
23) Hard candy
24) Beef jerky
25) Lotions
26) Coffee
27) Creamers (flavored)
28) Crystal Light to go packages
29) Protein bars
30) Vitamins
31) Snacks, such as cookies, crackers
32) Fruit snacks, such as fruit-rollups, dried fruit products
33) Nuts, saw a lot of requests for sunflower seeds
34) Tea
35) Tuna
36) Playstation games (PS1 or PS2) or computer games (PC)
37) Many are requesting MP3 players but this is the most expensive item I've seen so far
38) Wipes (like baby wipes, hand wipes, etc.)
39) Any food that can be shipped and cooked in a microwave (such as Easy Mac, or microwave meals, Ramen noodles, fruit in cups, pudding, peanut butter, jelly, etc. Just think of something you would be missing if you couldn't have it). Their PXs are very limited in variety and the soldiers crave most anything.
40) Cards, letters and well-wishes. This is remarkably important for the soldiers who are often cut off from everyone and everything.
41) Phone cards
42) Flash sticks
43) Things NOT to send: Chocolate (can't handle the heat); any food item that is expired; cans of food are extremely heavy and when the soldiers are out in the field, not very reasonable for them to carrry, they request light, good on the go items; anything hazardous (duh, right?).

I would like to have any items you are willing to donate by August 1. Next time you do some shopping for yourself, just pick up some extra things and mail them off. For any of you living nearby me, I'll be happy to pick them up from you. Ask your friends and neighbors to contribute anything they can spare as well. Just $10 extra dollars from you can buy a lot of simple, cheap hygiene products. If you have a magazine subscription, gather up all your old ones and send those off as well. They do not mind used items, so if you have DVDs or books to send, feel free to. Use common sense in what you send though! Thanks from the bottom of my heart to anyone who can participate! You cannot put a price on how much good will come of this! Check out the website www.anysoldier.com which is where I will get my final shipping information. You will not regret it after reading the heartfelt thanks from these soldiers in need! Please send an email to get my shipping address: potterbm@umkc.edu or cecilia1015@hotmail.com

Love,
B

It's Been A Little While

Haven't blogged in such a long time. Sorry about that. This is probably going to be long. Or short. We'll see how I feel. It's too early to be up on a Sat morning. I'll try to keep it entertaining but that may be a lofty goal. No pics to add in, but I'll try to take some of the garden some time. It's really been producing. We've enjoyed some cucumbers, zucchini, green beans and tomatoes already! We have not since been visited by deer or whatever ate a little of the tomato plants up. I'll start by filling in with the internship.

It was incredible. Absolutely phenomenal. I learned so much, not only about medicolegal death investigation, but about myself. I can actually handle pretty much anything I saw. Although the kids bothered me, but that's pretty much everybody, so I don't feel wimpy about that. I saw everything from a small plane crash, to several homicides, lots of traffic accidents, too many decomps and lots of naturals. I got to do the external exams on some of the intakes, taking blood and other fluids, fingerprinting, etc. I liked the whole thing so much, I asked the Chief Investigator to keep me in mind if something opens up in the future and gave him my resume. The investigators work two 24-hour shifts in a week, getting five whole days off! How nice would that be? And they are definitely paid more than I am and they're hourly, so get 8 hours of overtime automatically and can get more if they want. Holidays are paid double-time. They even had little rooms with beds in them so if it's quiet they have the opportunity to catch some sleep. Sweet. So, at the very least, a new career possibility opened itself up to me. Big shout-out to all the people at the office, they were great!

Got back into the swing of work (which seemed slightly more boring than the internship, lol). And helped get a grant submitted, so everyone cross their fingers that we get funded. Got another paper accepted for publication and we're currently trying for the cover, so double cross fingers for that too. Celebrated with some collaborators by hitting a local bar and drinking myself into a righteous buzz. It was fun and I think it should be a weekly ritual that we take off from work early and hit the bar, hehe.

So, got all my papers (16!!!) done for the internship and then received a test that I've been working on off and on. It's due Thurs. so I hope to get it done this weekend. My poor car got a little sick and had to be diagnosed yesterday. It's the solenoid (sp?) and the part won't be here until Mon or Tues. Part of my Mazda warranty is apparently whenever there's any type of warranty repairs to be done, they give you a car. So, the dealership called Enterprise and requested a drop-off since I was stranded at work. Paul had dropped me off, but wouldn't be getting off work until after 9 pm and I didn't really want to spend that much time at work. Enterprise called right after the dealer and we scheduled the drop off and I gave him the address and directions to my specific building. Then I heard nothing again for three hours. I got the number from Paul to that Enterprise and called them. They didn't answer first time around, but second time they did. And proceeded to be completely confused about what the hell I was talking about. So he said he'd call back, but also said they were closed several times, so I thought I would not hear from them again. I called the dealership back and luckily the service dept manager was still there doing paperwork, so when I apprised him of the situation, he tried contacting Enterprise through several different numbers and got ahold of no one. He called me back after trying to find me a loaner car (which he couldn't) and offered to come pick me up and take me home. I felt bad, but was stranded so agreed and gave him directions. The Enterprise kid surprised me by calling back and once I re-told him the whole story and gave him the name of who set up the drop-off, he asked if I was in desperate need of a car right then because they were closed (had to throw it in again I guess). During my wait time, I sent off a scathing email to Enterprise customer service which will likely be ignored. I told Enterprise kid that they could forget about it, someone from the dealership was picking me up, then in order to not start yelling, I hung up. Chris picked me up (thank you nice man) and on the way home we chatted. He said he gives Enterprise over $8000 (or he said $6K, I don't remember) a month in business from the dealership and will be contacting someone today about the horrible lack of competence over there. And he mentioned that there's 4 or 5 other companies just waiting to take over for Enterprise. I'm going to guess HE isn't ignored. So, I finally made it home and am stuck here all weekend. Which is good I guess since I have to finish that test. But I was royally pissed off. So, Enterprise sucks and screw them for leaving me stranded. Hopefully, they have to bend over backwards and kiss Chris' ass a lot. I hope they have to beg. Yep, there's that sadistic streak in me coming out. I haven't quite mastered the whole "forgive and forget" thing, but I think I'm justified in this instance.

I think we're going to be going out tonight after Paul gets off work, so I plan on taking a long nap later in the afternoon after I fertilize my garden. Well, I think this is long enough for now to make up for all that time away and I'm sure all your eyeballs are crossing by now. I will post more later!

Love,
B